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IG News (Tokyo) — Girl group sensation AKB-48’s latest single to hit the top of charts is “Slurp My Noodles, Daddy!”

Churu-churu!, churu-churu!,” rapped lead singer Atama Karrapo, “slurp my noodles, daddy, drink my broth! Churu-churu!, churu-churu!

“Oh, I spilled some tsuyu on my tummy!” squeaked Rita Roh, the girl who can’t sing or dance but the producer likes her, “I’ve been a bad, bad girl. You know what happens to bad girls? Hee-hee!”

Rumors are flying on Twitter that Lady Gaga declined to appear with AKB-48 during a recent tour in Japan because she “didn’t want to be upstaged.”

Asked for comment, record label A Vex’d spokesperson Perky Oppai said, “No, no, those aren’t anal beads.”

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In other news, Russian sleeper spies forget to wake up.

One Comment

  1. I can’t front: that one on the left does it for me. Between the shorts and the Wonder Bread shorts, the Wonder woman topand the anal beads (though Oppai denies it) I’m ready to settle down!
    “Oh you spilled some? let me get that for you”(-:

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