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TOKYO (IG News) — Millions of Japanese mourned the loss of the woman’s figure skating gold medal to that bitch Kim Yu-na of South Korea.

“Today, February 26th, a day that shall live in infamy,” said Prime Minister Yukio “Bird” Hatoyama before breaking down in tears, “I can’t believe Mao-chan lost to that bitch Kim Yu-na.”

Rioting broke out in front of the Republic of Korea embassy in Tokyo, as self-proclaimed “Mao-ists” clashed with Kim Yu-na supporters known as “Yu-na Sandwiches.”

“Mao-chan was robbed!” shouted Ninnikukusai Orewa, head of the Japan Federation of Old Farts, “Mao-chan nailed the triple axel, whatever that is, and is much more kawaii than that bitch Kim Yu-na.”

“In the spirit of the Olympic movement, what is important to remember is both athletes gave their best,” said South Korean President Lee “Yukke” Myung-Bak, “the Korean people’s joy has nothing to do with revenge for Japan’s oppressive colonization of Korea and cultural genocide of 1910-1945. Yeah, right. Who’s your daddy now?! Bwah-hah-ha!”

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In other news, Japanese Defense Minister Utsuzo Teppo denied rumors that Japan was planning to invade the disputed Takeshima islands early Saturday morning when the entire Korean nation will be waking up with the 엄마 of hangovers.

Posted via email from invisiblegaijin

4 Comments

  1. ROTFLMAO!!!!!

  2. HAHA this is awesome too.

  3. Birdy McHatoyama-san said “bitch”! OMG!

    this was freaking hilarious


3 Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. By uberVU - social comments on 27 Feb 2010 at 12:01 am

    Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by sfsmjobshoot: Japan Mourns as Mao-chan Loses Gold to that Bitch Kim Yu-na http://bit.ly/aHnmFk #news #socialmedia…

  2. […] “Let me be clear: old farts must observe the law unless their mommies make illegal political contributions,” commented Prime Minister Yukio “Bird” Hatoyama, “and I still can’t believe that Mao-chan lost the gold to that bitch Kim Yu-na!” […]

  3. […] unleashed thousands of hina-ningyo warrior dolls today to invade Korea in retaliation for Kim Yu-na’s victory over Asada Mao in the Vancouver […]

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